I think my approach has always been the same as yours: keep providing value to those who see you as valuable, until those that don't want you around scheme to get rid of you, then move on. Can't change those that don't want to change. I always figure if I can touch just one person in a positive way in any situationI, I'd consider the engagement a success.
I have a question though. Is this recurring manager always a "he"? My experience is yes, but not exclusively. And a second question... what do you think you are expected to learn by this recurring pattern? Annoying question, I know, but I couldn't help but ask :)
Sadly, I don't think there is any amount of encouragement you can offer. In fact, I think the more encouragement the LESS likely they will want a coach. Ego is a powerful, powerful force. They operate on lots of statements that start with "I." I am the best developer. I was promoted and promoted and promoted because I produced results. For me, I needed to have a few life-altering events to check that Ego (i.e. beat the s&*% out of it) before I really started looking for a different way of doing things. It took time. You can leave a trail of breadcrumbs and hope that at some point in the distant future something clicks with that person.
I am curious though - why do you think this person keeps coming back to you? You clearly add value else they wouldn't keep coming back.
I think my approach has always been the same as yours: keep providing value to those who see you as valuable, until those that don't want you around scheme to get rid of you, then move on. Can't change those that don't want to change. I always figure if I can touch just one person in a positive way in any situationI, I'd consider the engagement a success.
I have a question though. Is this recurring manager always a "he"? My experience is yes, but not exclusively. And a second question... what do you think you are expected to learn by this recurring pattern? Annoying question, I know, but I couldn't help but ask :)
Sadly, I don't think there is any amount of encouragement you can offer. In fact, I think the more encouragement the LESS likely they will want a coach. Ego is a powerful, powerful force. They operate on lots of statements that start with "I." I am the best developer. I was promoted and promoted and promoted because I produced results. For me, I needed to have a few life-altering events to check that Ego (i.e. beat the s&*% out of it) before I really started looking for a different way of doing things. It took time. You can leave a trail of breadcrumbs and hope that at some point in the distant future something clicks with that person.
I am curious though - why do you think this person keeps coming back to you? You clearly add value else they wouldn't keep coming back.