a virtual expert

virtually an expert or an expert virtually?

A couple of weeks ago, I wrote about how I wanted to show up to those who are early on their journey into the weird and wonderful world of agile. I wrote that letter to prepare myself for some future role that felt many weeks - if not months - in the future. I certainly didn’t expect to be employed in a couple of weeks, let alone need to remind myself to be nice to my clients and colleagues.

I often forget that one needs to work at building psychological safety as I have such a high need for it myself that I intuitively try to create a safe environment with everyone I interact with. This is part of who I am, so I can forget that it is a skill I have developed since childhood. I am a millennial, so anything I learned as a small child, I learned in an offline, unconnected, and real world. Many skills we learn as small children are highly contextualised, and I am finding out this is true for my desire for psychological safety. Video conferencing does not trigger this need for me, nor does it engender me to create it.

My neurodivergence causes me to have difficulties accepting other people as real beings; some childhood trauma may also have compounded this effect... This is exacerbated when people on video conferences don’t have their cameras on and perhaps don’t even talk. Their presence is shown but not known. To all intents and purposes, if you cannot see a person or interact with them, they are not real.

I am sure I am not alone in this sensation. I think neurotypical people also have this uncanny sense about someone’s avatar (or worse still, initials in a circle) when they are not really there. (I’d love to hear in the comments if this is true for any of my neurotypical audience.)

So how am I tackling this?

I have endless post-it notes stuck around my monitor, each one emblazoned with some letters or an icon or some other aide memoire of how I want to behave. I read them all every time I sit at my monitor, before every video call I participate in, and whenever I’m stuck for inspiration. This means that I not only know them well, but I am also looking at them as much as I am looking at the other participants (in particular, those silent with their cameras off).

I will teach these teams the value of scrum and hope they realise the importance of commitment, focus, openness, respect, and courage; and what it actually takes to embody these things. Creating a team charter using the scrum values as categories is a great way of tackling two dysfunctions simultaneously: how we treat the people we work with and not understanding the framework we work within.

Being patient with them and myself. I am not used to being a virtual expert and will likely tread on many more toes along the way. These teams are delivering and doing so in trying circumstances; I need to assure them I’m here to help make it better and not be a thorn in their side.

Unlike most of the workforce, I did not work through the pandemic. (Apart from being an exhausted twin mum, and I couldn’t dial that job in.) Since September, I have worked in a hybrid environment with all the awkwardness and online tools. My colleagues tell me how much better it is now than it was in the beginning of 2020. I am on a journey you went on years ago. I hope the stories I tell you about my journey through learning online collaboration bring you a giggle, memories of embarrassing moments, and memories of successful ones too.